Alright, fudged with a few of the settings here, the following were adjusted:
Basic Settings:
Turned on FPS counter,
Turned on 'Auto-Adjust Quality Level'
Advanced Settings:
Set Texture Memory Restrictions to 0 (I think, the menu's really effed up with the graphical nonsense)
It's not perfect, but looks to be a step in the right direction, the textures flicker like there's no tomorrow, but at least the characters KINDA look like they're supposed to.